Monday, May 14, 2012

Open Book

Learn something new every day. Live and learn. Learn to live together. Learn the rules of the game. Learn from yesterday. Those that learn stay young. Learning is a lifelong process.  Learning results in change.
I love learning. One of the things that initially attracted me to my husband is he was a college graduate who enjoyed reading and learning. Now that we’ve been married for going on twenty years he has earned his Masters degree, taken numerous certification classes, ongoing education classes, training and specialty classes, and is currently teaching college classes after his regular work.
Wouldn’t you think that he enjoys learning?

Well, he doesn’t. He becomes furious if I try to show him or tell him something about a subject he isn’t familiar with.
“Don’t tell me what to do!” he huffs.
“Leave me alone!” he grumps.
“How would you know that?” he challenges.
Ah yes, the rigid, closed mind of the one with Aspergers Syndrome.
Since I became aware of Steve’s Aspergers diagnosis I have read everything I could get my hands on about the syndrome. Books, articles, websites. The good, the bad and the ugly. Since I started this blog I’ve read and reread even more and am learning every day.
My sweetie, however, is very resistant to change. He wants to stick to the same old same old. He doesn’t want to be told anything. He hates to make mistakes. He beats himself up if he does.

It seems that I walk a tightrope every day, balancing his needs, my needs and our kids needs. I try to assure Steve that he is worthwhile and can choose his own reactions to situations. That none of us is perfect, and we should just try to do today better than yesterday.
Piet Hein, Danish inventor and poet says it best.
The road to wisdom?
Well, it’s plain to see,
and simple to express:
Err
and err,
and err again
but less
and less
and less.


I am an open book, eagerly awaiting the next chapter. My Sweetie, however, has not only slammed his book shut, it seems that he is sitting on it while all the glue between his pages dry...

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