This sign pretty much says it all.
So many times I am upset at situations of my own making or design. Things that I purposely allow to bother me.
The need to be 'correct'.
Lack of knowledge or understanding of Asperger or Autistic behaviors.
Judgement of my life in comparison to NT couples' marriages.
I try to snap out of it by going online to read blogs and posts by others dealing with their own Aspergian traits, or those of family members and loved ones.
The key, I think, is 'love'.
I never expected adult behaviors from my toddler children. I did try to teach them by example, as well as verbal instructions. We practiced new situations. We role played challenges and problems. We rehearsed and giggled and laughed.
Strange as it may seem to regular NT adults, these same methods often need to be used with my husband. Sometimes even over, and over, and over again.
I see in various discussion groups and blogs the annoyance, frustration, and even anger at the necessity of this basic truth in our NT/Aspie lives.
It is so very true that there are moments when I don't 'feel' the love. Doesn't matter. I married for better or worse. I just had no concept at how much 'worse' it could get at times.
I would not tolerate physical abuse of myself or my kids, but I'm reminded that there are times when what I consider to be 'verbal abuse' is nothing more than semi-typical Aspie blunt/rude/blurt/bark.
I can choose to ignore it. I can go for a walk, put music on with headphones, go out to run errands, distance myself from the tirade. I can choose to not participate.
No, I don't always laugh. No, I don't always apologize immediately. And no, recognizing those things in our lives that I can't change doesn't always dawn on me at the moment.
My life is what it is. I am very thankful for all of you out there who are sharing in this strange and ever evolving journey with me.
You are much appreciated!