Saturday, January 19, 2013

Seems Out

Let’s face it. Not having thumbs that work sucks. It’s amazing how many things we do on a daily basis are reliant on working thumbs.
I have arthritis in mine. Freezing temperatures, of which we’ve now had for over two weeks straight, aggravate my condition. I try not to whine or complain, but doggone it, I hate dropping my coffee.  
We all have things in life that are challenging. I also have Hearfore disease (when one goes into another room just to stand there and wonder what one is ‘here for’), Dunnshrunk disease (my arms ‘done shrunk’ and I can’t read as well anymore), and Zumtymers (pre Alzheimer’s – zum tymes I remember and zum tymes I don’t).
Steve is challenged with Aspergers Syndrome. He faces obstacles in thought processing, social interaction and communication (or lack thereof) every day.
Because he and I process our thoughts differently, and our viewpoints on ‘logic’ can so vastly differ, household chores that my Sweetie helps me with during my ‘bad thumb weather’ can end up making me laugh or cry.
Take our bedding for instance.
Sheets, especially fitted ones, are too difficult for me to manage when I can’t grip well. So Steve has been making our bed lately. Last night I noticed that the seams were facing out on the corners of the fitted sheet. When I asked him why, he said that it is because he was trying to use it both ways so it would wear more evenly.
I asked if that was why he had the finished side of the flat sheet away from us and towards the blanket.
“No, it’s because it has a seam at the top and bottom. You just said that seams go in, so the seams are going into the bed.”
I try to explain that the finished side seam was in against the blanket. The non-finished seams were against us. Exactly, says he. It would be like wearing your clothes inside out to put them away from us.  
His logic seems conflicting to me and I could tell that the wheels were turning in his mind, though his face was blank. I quickly assured him that it really didn’t matter and that I was just happy that there were clean sheets on the bed. If it were up to my abilities that day, there wouldn’t have been.
It ‘seemed’ to be a good time to turn off the lights and go to sleep on clean sheets, ‘seamed’ in or ‘seamed’ out is totally unimportant when you are unconscious, lol.


  1. Oh man, this is a good one. Since the realization of my husband's AS, I've been seeing so much about how our logic is just completely different, and I'm learning how to just let things go. Especially in situations like this one where he was just trying to help. Thanks for sharing!

    P.S. Sorry about your thumbs! Hope they feel better soon!

    1. have you ever wondered how it must feel from their side? when asked, steve said "huh?" - lol

    2. and thx for concern re: thumbs - i'm trying to convince the dr. to prescribe a trip to warm tropical islands...

  2. Steve changes the sheets!!!!!! Wow, that would be deemed housework and that does not compute with my two Aspie's. But neither does mowing the lawn or washing the car or Oh, lets face it , other than meeting their own needs (by asking me to do it) that's really all they are worried about. Since my Aspie hubby is jobless at the moment and home all day with 16yr old Aspie son, I have written a note each day letting know what I have put out for lunch and a little job like emptying the dishwasher or bringing clothes in. For three days, I wrote a note and then on 4th day I was just too busy before work. Guess What - they didnt do anything and went out for takeaway. When i asked why the DW hadnt been emptied, the answer was - You didnt write a note. Goodness me.

    1. lol - oh so familiar! hopefully they didn't use too many dishes for their takeaway!