Monday, May 28, 2012


Do you know how hard it is to lie perfectly still when you are wide awake, the sun is up, the birds are singing, and you're craving coffee? I try to do it, but for me it is impossible. Holiday or not, it’s 5:00 a.m. and I’m ready to get up. Not so gentle snoring tells me that my spouse is not in agreement with me on this matter.
Kidlet is at his big bro’s. Daughter will be picking her dogs up later tonight. I’m not a dog-talker like my husband and I have no living beings to talk to. I make coffee, feed the dogs and fish, read, pray, meditate, social network, and write. An hour has passed. 

I go out to water my flowers on the decks and porches. I admire my shiny new barbeque that we purchased yesterday afternoon at a local box store during their Memorial Day weekend sale.
I unload the dishwasher, fill the water cooler, scrub the cooktop, counters and sinks, rearrange the pantry a bit. It's now 6:30.
I am honestly stumped at how my husband can go for days without human contact. I love being around other people. I crave conversation, playing games, cooking and eating together, crafting, watching ball games, even attending seminars and meetings. I don’t think I have Aspergers.
My Aspie is the exact opposite. He seems to abhor company. In the early days of our courtship we worked on cars together and listen to rock music. He would talk nonstop about those things, since they are his special interests. I am not as interested in engine specifics as Steve is, but am interested in mechanics in general. Heck, I knew what tool to go rent to get the pilot bearing out when we did a tranny swap on his Toyota pickup! As for the rock music, I can name that song in three notes or less. I am that good.
Now that we know more about Aspergers, I recognize the various Aspie traits that probably lend to his preferred isolation.
Lack of managing appropriate social conduct, high intelligence [doesn’t think others are as smart as him], anger management problems, controlling feelings such as depression, fear or anxiety, lack of empathy, inability to listen to others [he’s too busy with his own thoughts], inflexible thinking, repetitive routines provides feelings of security, stress when [his] routine suddenly changes, inability to think in abstract ways.


All logical (to me) reasons for my Sweetie’s aloneness. But hard to deal with when I’m the only one up this time of morning. I suppose I could throw some clothes on and run down to the grocery store. The employees are always happy to talk.

Anyone on the East coast want to have coffee via Skype?

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