Saturday, May 4, 2013

Sometimes It Sucks

Communication.
Expectations.
Marriage.
What do these things have in common? Some days in our household, not much!
Today is turning out to be one of those days.
According to Merriam Webster (whom I admire infinitely):
com·mu·ni·ca·tion noun a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior
ex·pec·ta·tion noun  the act or state of expecting : ANTICIPATION <in expectationof what would happen>
mar·riage noun an intimate or close union 
We, of course, all have our own specific views or understandings of these terms according to our experiences in life. But factor into the equation one person with Aspergers Syndrome with their own set of view points, and these definitions are blown out of the water.

“O hark, O hear! How thin and clear, And thinner, clearer, farther going!


Lord Tennyson was obviously not here in our home with us when he wrote that. My hubby, however, is. Along the banging, crashing, stomping, smashing that is accompaning him throughout the house.
A hurricane or tornado, you ask? Nope, just some common, ordinary vacuuming.  Courtesy of my husband. Perhaps that should read ‘discourteously’.  
Whoops! That last crash was an angel figurine. Of course it wasn’t Hubby’s, so it’s brokenness is of no matter. Again, the Gospel according to Steven.
*Sigh*
For the last twenty minutes since I asked The Hubster to vacuum the livingroom, kitchen, diningroom and main hall, I have also been asking him to calm down, deep breath and focus on acting like a grownup because his body language was telling me he was upset. He keep insisting he wasn’t angry or upset.
Baloney. I beg to differ.
Hubby, whether he wants to admit it or not, feels he is above and beyond ‘common chores’. He is of the opinion that as a retired, stay at home mom I should be capable of completing all the chores myself during the week and should not be asking for his help. He’s a gainfully employed engineer and lowly housecleaning is beneath his intelligence.
Humph!
This week has been busy. Kidlet has had four baseball games in the last five days. I’ve put over 500 miles on my car as the three away games were faaaaaaaaaar away! Which makes a three hour game into a five or six hour event. On game days I have to drive Kidlet to school as no large equipment bags or musical instruments are allowed on his school bus. Add to that regular shopping, two birthday parties and The Hubster's requested errands, and my week flew by with not one chance to vacuum. Hence, my request for help.
So, Steve has now been ‘shoo-ed’ out the door to leave me in peace. To finish this post, to piece my angel back together and finish vacuuming. Which I should have just done as soon as I started to hear the thunderous actions below my office.
*Deep breathe*
*Think calm thoughts*
I can do this. Especially while laughing out loud. Because it just dawned on me that breaking my things is the quickest way to get out of chores. I will always take over and do it myself.
I think I’ve been had.

4 comments:

  1. I very much appreciate these words today :)

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    Replies
    1. and i appreciate you sharing that - *sigh*

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  2. Yes you have and so have i today. I went out with a friend for the afternoon and came back to a mess but when i asked for help it was not forthcoming as i was the one who had been out all day galavanting all over the place. Well, they were at home but neither did anything other than make a mess. So arriving home at 6.30, its on with a meal for them, pack up all the dishes all over the bench (1 foot from the dishwasher), take up three prs of new work pants for hubby, go to new employer and negotiate for one son, and then when i asked for help to move the washing machine i got such looks of shock and horrow, how dare i interupt them from having fun. I was the one out all day. So, both are in bed and i will now at 11.30pm have to go manhandle the washing machine outside for the delivery men arriving first thing in the morning with the new one. Sigh....

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