Thursday, September 26, 2013

Rust in Peace

Time heals. Sorrows lessen. Loss initiates memories and, for many of us, thankfulness.

This last month has been hard for us as a couple. Monday I found out that my cousin’s husband had passed away.

I am humbled.

Here I am with my husband intact, albeit infuriating to me, and my cousin sits alone.

Perspective.

I look around our weedy, hulk littered property and am irritated. But my husband is still here to possibly clean it up, so I have hope. Were he to die, as much as I am tempted some days, he couldn’t. I too would be alone.

The times I find myself longing for ‘alone time’ I need to remember this. It’s easy to take myself off somewhere, and then come home. Death, however, would change that forever. Death is the final aloneness.

I have friends who’ve become widows. Some are still single. Some have remarried. Some of those marriages are already over. Those friends are once again alone.

Focus.

I need to remember to be thankful. I need to focus on the positive. I need to choose to be happy, or at least choose not to be upset.

I am soley responsible for my own actions and reactions. Not everything in life is going to be good, easy, enjoyable or understandable.

Not everything is going to be fun.

Life can be hard at times, but the good thing is that it is life, not death.

As I mourn with my cousin and her family, I am reminded afresh of how blessed I am. I can hug my hubby when he comes home from work today. I can lay down beside him as we retire for the night.

And, Lord willing, wake up next to him tomorrow morning.


May his many ‘projects’ rust in peace. Today I choose not to complain.

3 comments:

  1. I think the biggest choice, to the one to forgive so you can keep on going. Resentment is like a death to a marriage. I am hearing you....

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  2. You just described our property perfectly! Men with Asperger's, hard to live with but hard to live without them!

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